Finding the good

 I'm not really sure how I feel about today's ride. 

I tacked Funny up as it was thundering a tiny bit and threatening but it looked like it was going to go around us. And it did. Mostly. We had a tiny bit of rain hit us. But not enough to really even get us wet. And it did help cool it down a tiny bit. Then the sun came back out. And then the clouds came back. 

 

We spent a good bit of time at the walk starting out and... she feels behind my leg suddenly. Like... I kind of had wished I had a crop. Or spurs. I had to "shock and awe" her a time or two. Which... was a lot worrisome. First of all... who are you? Are you sick? And second of all... am I about to get launched? Will there be payback? But there wasn't. And she's fine. So I'm not really sure what's going on here. But we managed to finally get a nice smooth walk that was forward and soft. Then the trot wasn't kind of sticky too. But also kind of quick at times. It was just a wierd ride. I couldn't quite figure out what the issue was. Sometimes it was that she was crooked. So I just kept at it and we finally got some nice trot. And then we cantered and again, the first two canters were not great. She was running away with me essentially. But then I managed to get my body situated and she settled. And I did try to give her some "brain breaks" today and let her process when things were good. So maybe that helped. 

 

Because eventually we got some really nice work in. Like... quite nice. Granted it took me halting her from the canter a few times. Which I hate to do. But I got so aggravated that she was running away with me and ignoring my aids. Sigh.. ugh. But we did get a nice canter after that, and then some nice downwards into nice trots. 

 

So yeah.. I have no idea. I don't know if it's just tension because I suck... tension because she's just anxious about work. Or it's not actually tension and just imbalance? I don't know. I don't know why I've been struggling so much lately with her. But she got some good girls, some pats, some rests and time to process, and of course cookies!